Unsettled

The great winnowing of possessions

Releasing the unnecessary

Shredding the past

Carefully boxing up the essential

Giving, giving, giving

Each load that goes

A bit more freedom gained

The road calls strongly

“Are you coming?

Are you on the way?”

Well, I’m going somewhere

Similar to a place I’ve been

Time adjacent

The stream has run the long course

The years have changed me

I will step into the water

Remembering the stream that was

And the young woman who grew there

I bring the world with me

All that I’ve seen since then

Molded by travel and children and joy

Reduced by loss and loneliness and pain

A life changing movement

A life changing moment

A new start

A fresh beginning

“I can be flexible”

I said

And made it so

“I don’t have the confidence for this”

I confided

And yet it arrived with that acknowledgement

Not the brash bravado I used to wear

A committed determination

All I can ask of myself today

Is to show up for this life

To risk, and to try

I am not alone in this

I am loved

I am loved truly and fiercely

“Let me know if there’s anything I can do”

There is room for me

In this world

That for so long I felt

Held no space for me

I will step into the water

And let it cool my feet

From the heat of travel

And rest a moment

As the sun filters down through the trees

Small Illumination

When the night falls silently

Cloaked over the restless day

Fears of the dark and unknown

Rising within and surrounding without

Each step feels fraught

Will the ground hold

Will the path stay steady

Is there a missed obstruction

Feet tripping over downed branches

Choices not taken or rued

How the heart beats faster

Shallows in the breath

The ominous quiet pervades

Calm is the challenge

Centering within

Cultivating a small illumination

That window to an infinite light

Texturing a peace

Like still water refelecting

The light of the round moon

Whole

Through the mists of fate

One sure step taken

To reveal the next

This is how, then

The journey resumes

In this small illuminated place

Couple (with audio)

They look over the water

From grizzled visage

The years layered and weathered

On sentinel faces

She wonders if spring will come soon

And if the family of mallards will return this year

He is watching a crow fly and doesn’t answer

She did not need him to answer

After so many years

The most important conversations were silent

They overlook

They withstand the changing seasons

Growing older

Perhaps growing wiser

It’s hard to tell from here

Watching the bark shift in the dancing light

I think they are happy there

Together by the water

As their silences span days, and months, and years

I visit when I can

And listen to the wisdom

Left unsaid

Thrumming from the tree which

Holds them sacred

Vigilant couple

Watching over the water

Keeping an eye on the sky

I’ll be back

I tell them

But they know that maybe I will

And maybe I won’t

After I’ve left she tells him

They always think they know

And that’s their biggest flaw

He looks at the sky, empty now

And holds his peace

Fragile (with audio)

Sandcastles and porcelain

The ice layer formed just above flowing water

A second day bruise

We build and build

Careers

Identity

Relationships

Longing for longlasting

Pieced together like paper thin ice

Over an air pocket above flowing water

Drop the porcelain

See it shatter into sharp shards

Watch the waves of time wash away the work

Of a lifetime

And we build and build

Ants pouring out of a nest to remove and replace

Each misplaced grain of sand disturbed by the giant feet of fate

And one day we breathe

A pause in the scurry-hurry tedium

And listen to who we are

Who we are

Who are we

What are we

A small flame in the dark night

The rise of the sun glowing on the horizon

The waves reaching for the shore

Coming close then retreating

The sprout of a seed in a slow rise to heaven

Breathing life into every action

Breathing love into every thought

We leave building behind us

And reveal ourselves

The revelation arrived on the breath

The flow unstoppered flows from the vessel

Nothing has changed

Everything is different

The outer is still fragile

Unforgiving

Inside is strength eternal

Compassionate

We dare to love

We dare to dream

Building once again with reverence

Building once more with intention

Understanding that it will

Of course

All wash away

It will shatter

And it is worth it

Still

Additional offerings:

Encompass Me

If I am drowning in you

Let me not breathe air again

If you are darkness

Keep all light from me

If you are light

May shade never find me

If you are beauty

Let all that is not beautiful be repelled

If you are truth

Can deceit not wither and die at last

Encompass me

My breath

My heart

My spirit

My love

I within you

You within me

Home, indestructible

This is love then

This unity of spirit

The light breeze on bare skin

A wonder shining in eyes contemplating of heaven

Feet ground into mud

Beings of fire, earth, water, air

Flames have no edges

We burn together in a cosmic votive

Cardamom scent rising

As I encompass you

Encompass me

Mountain Song

The hike looked so much different

On the map

We climbed the husband

Left the sisters alone

There were spots for fishing

Near the wildfire zone

Black towering creaking trees

The lakes were dry

The ponds were dust

We set off seeking water

Headed to a giant lake near cliffs

And shadows

Came to a sea of grass

We searched for water

In a sea of grass

Buck meadows and honey lakes

The reflected water turned out to be

Just shadows

Just shadows in a sea of grass

He lost his companions near the driest ocean

He called for his friends searching

They were all searching for water

In the shadows

Near a dried up creek bed

They finally found relief

A small pool of water for filtering

Reunited they filled their bottles

They shared a bounty

From the sea of grass

We are all shadows in a sea of grass

Mirages tricking sight and mind

Keep going then

Until you find

A pool of water or a

Mountain lake

Set up camp near the cool clear water

In the presence of ghostly remains

Of tree stumps blackened from the fires

Under the stars

The bats and owls

Under the stars the owls

Chase bats

Reflect on your reflection

Are you water

Or a sea of grass

Are you water

Or a sea of grass

person on a bridge near a lake
Photo by Simon Migaj on Pexels.com

This song was based on a story my son, Alex, told of one of his more recent hikes with his friends. If you follow the link to his twitter feed, the most of the posts are from a trip he took to Europe some years ago.