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Learning to Fail

Careless wishes

To desire patience is to invite adversity

To want grace begs humiliation

To long for mastery calls mistakes

There is no other way to learn

Or become better

But through the rough

Thus, we stand in the spotlight

Gear failing on the stage

Fumbling for chords

Stammering lines

Out of tune

Out of rhythm

Ploughing forward

Disaster upon disaster

Teaching us that it is not the end

This

Imperfection

This

Being human

This

Striving

Against the odds of ourselves

Weeping and laughing

Losing and winning

Another step forward

Learning to fail

Learning grace

Learning patience

This grand experiment

Success is on the other side somewhere

Across the bridges built

Brick by brick

Try by try

Redoubled effort

Persistence

Hope rises to answer

Each careless wish

By learning to fail

We learn to fly

brown hawk flying freely
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We Carry Nothing Now

How heavy it feels

This illusion

On days of greys and glooms

We say if onlys

And we say what thens

Wondering if there were more

Or less we could have done

Can we but stop time

Or go back

Or be different

The flowers would all be in bloom

The sun would shine

Our very souls would unravel

Into beams of starlight

We look forward lifting

Heaving the past with us

Dragging our mistakes behind us

Again again again

Piling new ones onto the old

If onlys

What thens

Why not ungrasp

The hold of fear

In realization of our light

Reduce the shadows

Become wild and free

Wind and ocean

Vast and unencumbered

Right now

Increased

body of water during dawn
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Are You Full Yet?

Did you finally get enough of yourself

Your lies and denials

The bullshit excuses

Have you looked in the mirror

And said enough

Enough squirming away

Enough closing your eyes

Enough self defeating

Sabotage wielding

Ego bashing madness

Enough wild bravado

Enough always the best

Enough of perfection

And embraced what was left

Have you let yourself be

Wounded and vulnerable

Loving and loved

Mistaken and sometimes

Partly right

Have you opened to love

Without demanding it

Have you opened to joy

Without remanding it

Have you finally finally

Let go of judgment

Let compassion enter

Stage left

Swim a minute

In the lake of love

Float there and look at

The sky above

You’ve caught out

Human and flawed

Worthy of love

Even in the midst

Of your self doubt

No need for haters

Within

They will arrive by storm from

Without

No matter how good or perfect

Or reckless you become

So drift there, my love

In all your beautiful spirit

Love has got you

Coming and going

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Halves

We split apart in the beginning

During the great expansion

Hearts breaking open

With each loss growing larger

With each good-bye softening

With each morning shining

Though cold dark times we flailed

The great failings

Huge mistakes

Mispoken words

Storms surrounded us

Blowing strong against us

Until we were reduced

Bare bones and sparkling spirits

Wrestling demons and decisions

There was that perfect hello

When all that had been awry

Clicked into place

The great turning of keys in locks

Chains falling unneeded to the ground

Now we fly through clear blue skies

Skimming and diving and circling

Choosing and creating a nest in a tall tree

Under the eaves

Under the daytime moon

We dream soft and pure

True and good

Of that peaceful lake within

Whose shore we never leave behind

Again

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I Slept Grateful

In the quiet evening hush

I held this daily accounting

Where did I error there

Where did I do right here

What were those mistakes

And how to approach repair

What did I do well

What can I build from that

With a kindly eye I counted

My thoughts and deeds that day

Thankfulness arises gently

Gratitude showed up too

These little daily blessings

Adding up and adding up

Before each time I close my eyes

I am refined

I sleep sublime

white bed linen
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Trickster and the Panic Button

Big coyote energy

Sets the lights a’flashing

Warning bells alarmed by

Mistakes rolling downhill growing

Exponentially as each solution goes awry

The stakes are getting higher, and the tension’s rising fast

Each decision leading swiftly to the next thwarted intention

A moment in the chaos the realization makes a showing that this slapstick

Plot comedic can be halted if not reversed with some deep breaths and

A belly laugh rather than with getting seriously ingrained

In the drama of the moment in the fear of what could be

The bolting horse is slowing down

The calm is settling into the

Furrows and the divots

Fate left in the passing

Farewell Coyote bye

Below is a photo of my beloved Pasha, the Equine Saint of Panic, sometimes known as He Who Should Not Be Tied.

He runs gallantly in my dreams, and always in my heart his hoofbeats sing.