Imperfect Love

My heart loves perfectly

Wholly

Without terms and conditions

My heart is caged

Trapped

Within me

By mind and ego and scars

The past warps expressions

In the rush to emote

I trip over words

Phrased poorly

I am tactless

The worse it goes

The worse I make it

Stumbling and desperate

To give and share the perfect love I feel

The more I try

The more I fall

Stumbling over broken shards of truth

This healing is too hard, I cry

I squash the ego with humiliation

I’m sorry, I say

I’m sorry I’m broken

I’m sorry I wasn’t healed enough

I’m sorry I survived this way

I couldn’t find another way to make it

I couldn’t find a different way to live than this one

I contorted

To be loved

To be understood

I try to be what you need and what you want

Yet in the end I am just this

Mess of partially healed

Partially wounded

Partially wise

Partially healing

Partially damaged

Partially processed

Parts

I am a stew of emotions

I am a bird in flight in the rain

I am the limping wolf

The deer tangled in barbed wire

My heart is caught and wild and pure

If I knew how I would be only peace

If I knew how my words would only soothe

If I knew how my actions would only heal

If I knew how to be invincible

I would cease panicking

Stop suffering

End doubt

Even rocks are not invincible

The world itself suffers

All of life is a blend of love and pain

Light and shadow

I am a layered painting

I am a song of dissonance and harmony

And so are you

And so are you

Loving imperfectly like me

Being imperfectly loved like me

We muddle through it

Wading through this life

Knee deep in mystery

Bog sucking boots

Trying to find dry land again

We slog through the difficulties

Until we’re safe on the forest path

Filtered sunlight and dry trails

Our love growing more confident

Skewed a little more to perfect

A little further way from pained

And we walk joyous together

In the welcoming woods

Wendy Says Things Episode 2 Part 2.5 is Out Now

On Wendy Says Things, we have been talking with Tonya, a health and wellness practitioner, and long time activist. There’s still time to catch up on the podcasts before part 3 of Episode 2 comes out. There are plenty of resources, articles, and links in the show notes.

If you’re here for the poetry, more will be coming soon!

There are no coincidences, they are spiritually aligned events falling into the pattern as they were meant to.” ~ Tonya Floyd

And so, what we do is we minimize things that happened in the past that were traumatic. We use nostalgia to distance ourselves from the things in the past that we could bring forward that are positive when we should be doing the opposite. You know, with our traumas we could bring them forward to heal. With the things that are nourishing, we can bring them forward to nourish us.” ~ Wendy Kheiry