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God Allowed It

I have big questions

(Atheists are easy)

Did you ever wonder

If god is all powerful

Why those painful things


So much strife

So much grief

So much wrong is done

Worse yet

The wrongs done in the name

Of something else

I have big questions I am saving

For the day when I will die

Most start with Why

And some with

How could you let that happen

Maybe I will dissipate

My consciousness released

Maybe I won’t remember

How my time here was fully spent

But just in case it lingers

When I wake to reality

I have big questions that I’m living

That I’m keeping safe

Just wait and see

Are you a sadist, God?

Do you revel in the suffering down here?

Are you ‘teaching us a lesson’

Because even I am aware

That there are different modes and methods

Of teaching something true

And pain and suffering are garbage

Ways to get a message through

Are you keeping us in pain and discontent

So that when we jump through

Complicated hoops

We can receive a bit of grace

No complaining

Just rejoicing

That you have life at all

Be grateful

Says creator

Even if it’s hell you’re praying from

Dear God are you blind

So deaf you cannot hear the cries

Are you there at all, I wonder

And if I believe that’s true

What on earth does that say of you

That you allowed it

On your watch

You allowed it

On the clock

God allowed it

I’m in shock

If loving is what you claim to do

Then why did you allow it

Why did you make the rules

Catch 22

If God’s really a goddess

She isn’t off the hook

Does she turn her head

Does she refuse to look

Unless the prayers are made

At a sacred time, a sacred day

Will she withhold a loving guiding hand

Let the ills be come what may

Does she touch the budding blossom

Does she control the rains

Could she alleviate our suffering

Alleviate our pain

Does she laugh softly to herself

As we struggle hard against

The wars and woes of life

Every penny spent

Goddess allowed it

The times we were punched down

Goddess allowed it

Each and every time

So she could come along a little later

Pat us on the head and say

Good job growing stronger

From the things I could have stopped

And if he or she can’t break the rules

Who set them and who could

Is there something greater

Than a god or goddess who would

Hold back their ability to salvage

Their ability to save

Humans from the ugliness that

Life throws the human way

And if I were believer

And if my faith were strong

Could I stand there at the gate of death someday

In the end and still be wrong

Because God and Goddess they allowed it

And I worshipped anyway

two white concrete statues covered by dust
Photo by Sebastian Voortman on

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