There’s a nightlight in the bathroom
A good way to get a book taken away
Is to sit on the counter and read by it
The elastic on that night gown itched and pinched
A little ruffle around the cuff
Candy pink with flowers on it
A little ruffle by the calf
It’s not completely dark
A fan in the hall whirs to dampen stray noises
Private conversations
Whimpers and pleading
Thuds and crying
Yelling and misery
A good night is quiet
Not too quiet though
When something brews in that silence
I began to sing
I am a child of god and
this is my father’s world
grace would be amazing if it arrived in time
Can my voice stay the hands that violate
And would they have me sing in front of crowds
Using the voice that protected me
(or tried to)
I gave my voice away as an adult
I gave it to my babies when they struggled to sleep
I gave it to the dishes when they were dirty
I sang the floors clean and the dust away
I sang to the falling waters
To seedlings and horses
I made up songs and story songs to entertain
Rambunctious children
As they grew we sang together at the table
(this was never allowed to me when I was young)
This voice that falters in front of a camera
How a camera triggers
Being photographed and video’d
Exploited
Being shoved forward to perform
The grand lie of a happy home
We’re a happy family
We’re a happy family
Me mom and daddy
Sick
There’s a soft glow worm finger puppet
that provides a tiny light in the dark
while I sing myself forward
out of a nightmare
and into life
