Beyond Sorry

“I’m sorry…” she begins

Trailing off down the path of

Self recrimination

“There’s no sorry.” I tell her

It’s about the dishes maybe

It’s about expectations I don’t have

That she fears I might

It’s how the past gnaws her legs

Inhibiting movement

We are way beyond sorry

I wash the dishes

It’s a gift not a chore

So small I barely notice

I vacuum and mop the floor

Wipe down the baseboards

Clean the doors

She’s sorry and she’s not sorry

She thinks I think she ought to do

Different

It takes time to rewrite the story

We are way beyond sorry

There’s no judgment when I’m cleaning

There’s celebration

What to give the person who has everything

But time

Who gives to others without holding back

Who creates space, and opportunity

Supports, and lends a hand

It’s only temporary

This life

This moment

This situation in situ

The history is long and tangled

The friendship well established

She says “Thank you,”

Without an apology this time

Reacquainted

We are beyond sorry

No regrets

I survey the next room

And pick up the cloth

It’s not enough, but it’s something

She found a way to leave me afternoon Chai

I detail cleaned the coffee grinder

She gave me a beautiful bowl and a wooden elephant

I vacuumed the cobwebs from the corners of each room

I am sorry and not sorry

We are beyond it

Way beyond sorry

Full of gratitude for chosen family

I say “Thank you”

Without apology this time

Leave a Reply